Thankful For The Thunderstorm
I was never one to ask, “why me?”
That’s a little dramatic for most people living in a first world country if you ask me.
Plus I always knew why something wasn’t going my way. It’s usually by my own doing.
I can laugh about it now, but I took it all to heart; til it was dark and the self-hatred was hot.
Never directed it anywhere besides myself.
At my worst, the self-talk would’ve appalled anyone. Theoretically, if they heard it in public between two people, it would’ve sounded like a horrible bullying. Gross and unnecessary.
Give it up, guy, don’t you have better shit to do than taunt this dude?
I always recognized how blessed I was to have grown up in a comfortable home, food on the table, with two present parents, and a quality suburban education. I’ve been outwardly thankful for that part of my life in the past. Honestly, I feel a personal obligation to make the most of this life for that very reason. Nowadays I’m trying to apply that same principle to education.
Education came into my life at an important time. I’ve had a purpose for a long time but not enough responsibility for others. Teaching made that a bigger factor in in my life. I’m very thankful for the opportunity to bring more value to high school education in my community.
Even if I’m not quite where I’d like to be, I’m in a place where I wake up every day to do things that I actually WANT to do, and get paid a decent salary to do so. Much rather that than doing something I HAVE to do, even if the paycheck is a little better.
Years went by where I should’ve been much more thankful about everything in front of me, but I guess I needed a little more time to get right.
Finally I was able to let the rain come down and water my garden, rather waterboarding me.
By waterboarding, I of course mean indulging in self-loathing.
Giving thanks for this ability to even feel the “ s u f f e r i n g ” being endured — whichever one of life’s lessons is being learned — will create some parting clouds in the storm. It’s not necessarily about being thankful for the hardships you’re enduring, but those troubles do confirm that you’re alive on this planet and a part of its ecosystem and you’re supposed to be here.
The shower you can take and the food you can eat.
For the people you can reach out to and say hi.
That’s the juice.
In case you forgot, there’s a long list of people, some of whom you’ve already forgotten, that you could probably send a “hey what’s going on” text and they’d be happy to see your name pop up. You may think there’s not, but if you go through your phone, your social media, your old address book, your memory… I promise you’ll find enough.
Maybe instead of being frustrated, petty, and mad at the world, try to give thanks for the opportunity to better a situation, to live this life, and to experience everything this world has to offer each and every day.
After all, waking up under a roof, with food on the table, in a free country, and a chance to make a positive impact on community should be enough for anyone.
the feel v5
